Wednesday, April 16, 2008

So I just need to sugar coat everything...

On Monday we had our visit to the psychologist. I'm not going to go into every detail of the session, but it basically came down to Tyler's anger and what we need to do about it. Basically Ryan and I are to talk like this:

  • "Hey Dad (Ryan)!!! That was SO NICE of you to make dinner tonight for our family! Tyler, wasn't that nice of daddy?"
  • "I had such an EXCITING day today! I sat outside for lunch and it was WONDERFUL!"
  • "Aislynn, wasn't that so kind of Mommy to make you pancakes for breakfast today?!?!"

It's just silly. The dr. said that Tyler may be picking up on some of our stresses at home. Honestly, I think that she is crazy because I'm not feeling really all that much stress - unless the stress coming from his behavior counts. She also wanted us to try some sort of reward system with him, but everything that she suggested, we have tried already. So I think that is why she just wanted us to try this out first. My initial thoughts are, "This is so against what I believe in. Acting FAKE around people, even worse YOUR children! How is that going to teach them to not scream at you and tell you that they HATE you? But I'm willing to try anything at this point. We aren't sure if it is an attention or ADHD thing. Ryan was out of town Tuesday - Thursday, so I dumped all of this sweetness by myself. It actually did work. Tyler would get upset and start to act up, but I just doled out the sweetness and he changed his attitude. It just doesn't feel right. I mean, if he's banging the vacuum attachment against the wall and doesn't stop after I ask him 4 or 5 times, why is it effective when I say, "Oh Tyler! You have to stop banging up the walls and taking chunks out of them, but my oh MY are you great at keeping a rhythm!!! You would be such a COOL DRUMMER! Now give mommy a hug, you rock star!"

On Friday we go to the dr. again and this time Dr. Wedge will meet Tyler. I'm not sure how he is going to take to her, but maybe once she meets him she will get more to work with.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

Wow. I'm actually quite surprised that the 'sweetness' thing is working as well - it doesn't seem like it would.

Unknown said...

It's great that it's working, hope it keeps up. Maybe you won't have to do it for too long and he'll start to pickup some new habits. I can totally see you trying to keep your cool for the vacuum thing- I'm laughing- not at you, I promise :) I am certain my hands will be more than full pretty soon!

 
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